Sunday, February 24, 2013

Good Deeds



         The world has become a cruel place; the environment is bad for us and people are harsh. Long ago, it was easy to hitch hike, easy to ask people for favors and not worry when you leave your doors unlocked.  But as the years progress and the economy becomes unstable, people become stressed and unkind, so much so that it has become difficult to trust anyone. Being able to trust someone is an important trait. Having that feeling of safeness while walking on the side of the road seems unthinkable nowadays. Anything could happen within a short period of time.

            It’s difficult to pick up hitchhikers let alone be one. I’m sure everyone passes hitchhikers daily and you don’t think much of it. But if you pass an elder, you get a sad feeling in your heart, hoping someone driving behind you will pick them up when you don’t.
           
            On Saturday, February 23, my mom, Jaken and I were headed home from her work in Burnside. As we left, we saw a lady hitchhiking with her two young children. As we saw them my mom and I looked at each other, and decided to give them a ride thinking they were not going far. As we pulled over to the side of the road, I asked where they were going and the children said cheerfully,  “We’re going to Winslow!” I was surprised. This lady was walking with her two children in the cold to a place, which was over 50 miles. My mom and I decided to take them as far as Dilcon, but the kids fell asleep. How could we wake them?  How could we make them walk in the cold again? Well, we couldn’t.
           
            The two kids began chatting and playing with Jaken. They were well behaved, had good manners and they were beautiful. The mother told us they were going to visit her mother in the nursing home. She was very thankful, and she thanked us many times and made thankful comments to the Lord. As we got into Winslow, she and her kids became more and more excited. They ran into the nursing home carrying mutton stew and fry bread they had made at home. We slowly walked inside behind them. The grandma was waiting with the biggest smile on her face. She quickly said hi to us, and thanked us for bringing her children to see her. We decided to visit with my own grandma’s sister, who was also in the same nursing home.  It was already decided that we would also take them home again when they were done visiting.

            As we left the nursing home a couple hours later, the mother of the children asked us to stop to get food for her kids. We bought them food and began our way home. The kids sat quietly, eating. I began talking to the little boy whose name was Trevor and was in the third grade.  The little girl attended Head Start and her name was Tiara. We took them back to their house in Steamboat. The kids said goodbye and the mom thanked us once again.
           
            As we left their house I felt a sense of happiness. I could not imagine the kids walking in the cold to Winslow. I could feel how thankful the mom was for us. It made me think of the challenges people face daily. It was amazing getting to know the kids and making them happy. I’m thankful we made that trip to Burnside in the first place. This was our good deed. So with this I say, please try to make someone’s day by doing something nice for them, their lives may be more challenging than your own. 

Sunday, February 17, 2013

The Outcome


It’s amazing how easily you can judge someone, things, even places. You judge people by their looks, names and even their interest in different things. Places are judged by their names and how the town looks. Last week I was rattling my brain trying to determine which college I wanted to attend in the fall. I was stuck between Utah State University in Blanding Utah and Northland Pioneer College in Holbrook Arizona. I did not want to move to Blanding,  to move away from my family and to take the more challenging road.
This past week on Tuesday I took a trip up to Blanding with my mom. I wanted to give Blanding and the University a chance. Maybe I would like it, right? We dropped off Jaken at the babysitter’s and left Ganado by 7:30 a.m. We talked about everything; our open relationship gave us the opportunity to really understand each other. I really cherished the trip with her. I wanted to look around, but the fog limited the scenery. We drove for about an hour with a short stop at a store for snacks, and were on our way again. I saw the sign Utah state line; I had that little jumpy feeling. I told my mom to stop and I quickly took a picture. This is where I would maybe be traveling many times.
As we drove the fog slowly disappeared and the scenery was appearing again. The red of the rocks were beautiful. We passed through Bluff, Utah. The next town was Blanding.  I was excited to see the town but also afraid to make my decision. As we entered Blanding I tried my best to glance at everything. It was a very small town; I’d have to say smaller than Holbrook. We entered the college campus, which was also small. I told my mom I didn’t like it. I judged the town and the college; I didn’t like it being so small. My mom and I walked into the main building of the campus. We had a tour scheduled, and the college vice president greeted us. My first question for him was, “Do you have a daycare?” He replied with a “yes!”
We walked through the main building which was a two-storied. We met many employees, who were all extremely friendly. Each of them asked my name, where I was from and if I was interested in the college. I was hesitant from the beginning of the tour. I was hoping I wouldn’t like the college; it would definitely make my decision easier. As we walked through all the buildings, I was slowly falling in love with the school but I was trying to fight it.  It was small with a small population, but that’s what I wanted out of a college. We sat down to have lunch; I had the lumpy feeling in my throat like I wanted to cry. I didn’t want to make the decision of leaving home, to leave my mom alone and us out on our own.
As we left the college we decided to visit a close friend that also lives in Blanding. I sat down and right away he started talking to me. He gave me words of wisdom, words that I would always remember, words that changed my mind and gave me the courage to go for it. After our long discussion, we decided to look at open apartments in his complex. We walked into a two-story apartment, two bedroom and still brand new. I could see myself living there, with Jaken running around and having a good time. I loved the small town with no distractions, the apartment and of course, the college.
The drive home was way quieter. I was stuck; I didn’t know what I wanted. I kept telling my mom I liked it. I soon asked her what she wanted me to do but of course she didn’t answer. This was my decision. When we got home, I told Daniel about the trip and he was willing to go with us. He was willing to move to Blanding. On Thursday, February 14, 2013, I accepted my scholarship to Utah State University. I had made my decision.
Don’t judge places if you haven’t seen it. Don’t judge people if you’ve just met them. I learned that with this trip. Get to know a person or place before you judge. You might be wrong and love it! (: 

Sunday, February 10, 2013

Decisons, Decisions!

Throughout my life I have been dreaming about going to college. I was raised in a family who went to college and now has Master’s Degrees. I’ve put a lot of pressure on myself throughout High School to get the good grades and a high GPA that was expected of me. I made goals for myself. I told myself what I wanted to do and how I thought I would get there. But as I think about everything now, that road has changed. I have higher expectations, a bigger goal and an even bigger responsibility.
            I’m sure a majority of individuals have this dream, but many do not get the chance to live it. I have been given an opportunity to go to college, but having a child makes this decision much more difficult. Taking care of a toddler and being a full time student doesn’t seem like the dream. But this is my life and it’s what I have to do.
            I have applied to different schools, both close and far from home. I’m hesitant on whether I want to live far from my family or stay close. I’ve been accepted to Northern Arizona University, Utah State University, Fort Lewis College, and Northland Pioneer College. I’ve been slowly eliminating colleges. I’ve eliminated Fort Lewis College because they do not offer a nursing program and I’ve eliminated Northern Arizona University because of the high cost of living.
            This past week I found out I have been offered the Presidential Scholarship from Utah State University. It is supposed to be an honor, right?  But I don’t feel the way one is supposed to feel when one is thrown a free educational opportunity. I am thankful they believe in my potential and all the hard work through High School has paid off. But I’m confused and worried. How do I go through a University with a child? I’ve heard many college students without kids complain that college is hard, that you have to be totally committed and it’s a lot of work. So how do I do it?
            In the past, my mom has offered to keep Jaken here at home while I am off at college but how do I do that? The thought of leaving my son to go to college is frightening. I’ve been with my little boy since he was born and I’m not ready to let someone else raise him when it’s my job. The thought of leaving him for a day is difficult enough, how am I going to do it for a week? So leaving my son here is not an option for me. I want to take him with me, to go through the challenge together. I want him to see that I am working through the challenges for him.
            With everything screaming in my head, “Just stay close to home!” I want to take the challenge of going to university. Yes, this scares me so much but I have to do it for myself and most of all Jaken. I may not go to University but there is also the chance. I have already gone through come challenges with having a kid, but within me I believe I am strong enough to jump past this next big challenge if I get past my fears of leaving. So with this I say, jump past your fears, take the next bigger step. It’s your life and your decisions, choose what you want to do. It may not be what everyone expects of you, but that’s what makes you different.  

Sunday, February 3, 2013

My Navajo Tradition



         Throughout my life I’ve lived on the Navajo Reservation. I’m a young mom whose family was raised with the Navajo tradition that our elders and ancestors also learned from. I was raised to believe that within our Four Sacred Mountains, we are protected by our Holy Deities. I was told to take care of our land, respect our elders and don’t be afraid to be ourselves. Our Navajo land was once the pride of our people; no one was ashamed of calling it home. It was definitely not the dullest place people have said it to be, but the most beautiful. With the corn sprouting during the spring, the sheep grazing and the smell of a mothers cooking; it was home.

            I believe the Navajo are strong and determined people. My ancestors and elders worked hard every day of their lives. Mothers and daughters took on the duties of cooking, herding sheep and taking care of the Hogan. Fathers would hunt for food, and teach their sons men duties to prepare them for the future when they have families of their own. Prayers, songs and animals, all of Mother Earth’s bounty stood for something; at times helping us in ways we would never understand. Our tradition helps us get through difficult times; sicknesses, famine and personal hardships.

As I get older I notice that teenagers, Navajo or not, do not realize the importance of our traditions. Everyday I see on comments on Facebook and at school, the comments of “rez kids.” Navajo people and our land have been turned into a stereotype. We are now thought of as a dirty, poor reservation. Gallup, where our elders shop, is now the lamest place to go. Sheep meat (mutton) is now the nastiest thing to eat. If times have changed so much, how will it be when my little boy grows up and goes to school? Will the rude comments be worse? Will our Dinetah be a sad and lonely place? Will our traditions and language be forgotten?

This is what I’m afraid of! That my little boy will grow up to an even crueler world than now. That his tradition would be the worst practice of all? I know every mother’s fear is for her child to be bullied and not be accepted, but I would never have thought my worst fear for him is to be bullied because of his tradition, something that as Navajos we were once proud of and to be. I notice that young Navajo girls take our tradition for granted; degrading it because their friends are doing it and for what, because it makes them look cool or better than us? I wish they would realize they are only degrading themselves, their families, and their elders.

It’s hard to think this is what our world is coming too, but the best thing to do is prepare for the worst. No one knows what the future holds. Will this view continue as is or will it take a turn for the worse? No one will know, till the time comes.

So with this I say, I am a proud Navajo, I love my tradition, and I love my family. I thank my grandparents, my elders and ancestor for making that Long Walk. Thank You for keeping our tradition alive for this long, and I will try my best to keep it going. I love mutton, my language, and our ceremonies that keep me safe and healthy. But I am most proud that my Jaken will grow up in this traditional environment. I know it will keep him safe and out of harm’s way. He will always be my little Navajo boy and I will always be his Navajo momma.

I say to my generation, be proud of who you are, don’t take your religion or traditions for granted! In the end, no matter what you believe in, it will always be there for you, it will help you through difficult times and be with you during the happiest. Don’t let any person change your thought on what you believe.